Ethics

Neutrality

Do not take sides. Is it fair to all concerned? Make them feel heard, and allow them to hear. Never leave people hanging. A mediator should be curious, empathetic, understanding, and non-judgmental. Cannot project own emotion or be otherwise self-centered. A neutral must be willing to use personal evaluation when, and only if, necessary, and only when requested by a participant. She cannot be both neutral and self-absorbed. A neutral should not take sides, unless when normatively acceptable to press a participant into continuing progress toward an agreement. The mediator’s job is to go with the flow but stay aware of attempts at being spun. The perception of neutrality must be cared for as well: private conversations should be avoided outside of the caucus.

Honesty

Do not lie. Is it the truth? The mediator must be a faithful agreement scribe, except in cases of fraud. She encourages honesty and candor among participants and demonstrates that herself. There will be absolutely no misrepresentation of fact, unless necessary to protect confidentiality. Honesty is expected from participants as well: even when full transparency is not afforded, the expectation is that parties will not knowingly misrepresent any material fact or circumstance. A neutral must be prepared to have hard conversations when necessary and not hold back when progress is possible.

Self-determination

Do not bully. Mediators should only increase agency and never undermine self-determination. Parties make decisions, not the mediator, which ensures party participation and procedural fairness. A mediator should be relentless only in pursuit of an agreement, not in pressuring a side into a particular course of action. Mutual satisfaction must underpin all agreements. Although a mediator's suggestions may prove useful to participants, a mediator's job is to help parties identify the solutions that work for them and not prescribe them. Due to expectations for self-determination, no minors are allowed in Neutral Mediation sessions.

Privacy

Do not gossip. Mediations are confidential but not necessary private. At Neutral Mediation, conversations, even in caucus, are on-the-record by default but can be taken off the record or on the deep background at any time. When given confidence, a mediator should protect her sources like a journalist would shield hers. A mediator's private conversations do not leave the mediation session, ever. Trust in privacy is paramount and there are no exceptions to this policy except in narrow circumstances involving criminal activity.

Grit

Do not quit. Neutrals are human: they get tired and have bad days. Clients with tough problems need a mediator who they can trust is going to hang on to the bitter end. A mediator needs to be energetic, enthusiastic, and optimistic throughout. While quitting is always the participant's prerogative, the neutral needs to know that quitting is not an option for the mediator.

Style

Do what you do. Almost everything is under the control of participants during a mediation session. One thing that is not? The mediator's style. Each mediator approaches the practice with a unique viewpoint and a neutral is most effective when honoring that style in a session. Neutral Mediation brings a fluid style that is compassionate and candid, empathetic and vulnerable, focused and forthright. Ethics play an important part in style, as well, and should be similarly unperturbed by the goings on of a mediation. So long as a mediator acts in a way that builds goodwill and stronger relationships then their style should be preserved and honored.If you are concerned about mediation style, for example, the lack of formality typical of Neutral Mediation sessions, preliminary consultancy appointments are a good opportunity to make sure the mediator's style matches the client's needs in advance of the session.

Gifts

Do not accept gifts. It is OK for a neutral to accept something available to the general public but gifts otherwise put a neutral in an awkward position and should be avoided. While it is unlikely that a gift would sway a good mediator's neutrality, managing the perception of neutrality alone is worth strict adherence to a no-gift policy.